Happily Never After

19 Sep

On Saturday, our parish had their annual murder mystery costume party. Somehow, I got roped into playing Alice in Wonderland. (I’m quite certain I did NOT volunteer for this job!) I purchased the wig at the local Costume Emporium, found a dress in my closet that would do, and took an apron from the Colonial Costume Closet. The White Rabbit started life as a bear from the Thrift Store, but with the help of some card stock ears, he passed muster. The Squire was my wizarding friend. I think he resembles a Jedi, but he says that’s the wrong fairy tale.

It seems to be every girl-child’s dream to have long blond hair, but it is definitely was not my colour, and I thought the long curls pulled my face down and made me bear a strong resemblance to a horse. Cute.

We really did have a good time. Hansel was not there, as his sister Gretel didn’t want me to marry him, and we were afraid she’d make a fuss if he showed up. Goldie Locks was in attendance, alice-and-the-wizard as was Baby Bear, who was hot on her tracks for breaking the furniture and eating all the porridge. Our church organist was Maleficent, and did a terrific job; she is a marvelous actress. Little Red Riding Hood, Sleeping Beauty, Rapunzel, Snow White, Cinderella, and her fairy godmother, the Queen of Hearts, and various other characters.

Somebody killed Sleeping Beauty, and it turned out to be – Gretel! Didn’t break my heart. With her out of the way, now I can marry Hansel.

I’d had a scratchy throat all week, but when I got home, it was suddenly much worse. My uvula was swollen, and when I tried to sleep on my back (normal sleeping position) I kept choking, and when I turned onto my side, I couldn’t breathe. I was supposed to read on Sunday, but the Squire hustled me down to the local Doc-in-a-Box, where I was advised I had nothing more serious than a really bad cold and to keep out of other people’s way.


I have been blowing my nose almost non-stop. It’s amazing that my head can hold so much sh -, um, snot! Yes, that’s it. Snot! S’not funny, McGee.




4 Responses to “Happily Never After”

  1. thewritesteph.com September 23, 2016 at 3:13 pm #

    You’ve got the best (underlined several times) sense of humor! Gotta follow you, girl!

    They’re all defoliating the cotton where I live, so everyone gets sinus infections around this time of year. Nice.

    Feel better soon! I’ve already gotten over a bout of bronchitis, with laryngitis (awful!).

    • thisendoftheswamp September 24, 2016 at 12:58 am #

      I caught bronchitis on one of my trips to the hospital. No fun. Thanks for joining the party over here!

      • thewritesteph.com September 25, 2016 at 9:29 pm #

        You seriously caught it from the hospital?!? Ugh!

  2. thisendoftheswamp September 26, 2016 at 12:46 pm #

    Hospitals are no place for sick people! There are too many antibiotic resistant germs floating around, which is why they try to get you in and out as quickly as possible.

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