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Vampires and Other Animals

20 May

This morning I threw a batch of chili into the crockpot, and was just reaching for the second jar of seasoning when I realized I’d put a teaspoon of dried garlic into a recipe than called for a quarter that amount. I managed to scrape out a good bit of it, and then put in the required teaspoon of dried onion, but I don’t think The Squire and I will have to worry about vampires for a while.

Yesterday I walked up our road about a half a mile, picking up aluminum cans and other trash. There was a plastic cup half buried in a pile of dried leaves, so I moved the leaves aside and disturbed a very annoyed juvenile ground hog. The little fellow could have sat in my cupped hands, but he was pitching a fit large enough for several critters. It was hard to tell which of us was the most startled by the encounter. He reminded me of a kitten – all arched back, fluffed fur, and sparks, but not really much to back it up. Except a set of teeth that looked as if they were ready for business.

Tsula, our mama fox, has obviously been coming down to the house early in the morning. (Cherokee for fox.) We’ve been making sure she has a good sized dinner in the evening, but you can certainly notice that foxy aroma at 8 AM. I did find about two-thirds of a squirrel’s tail on the walk one morning, but haven’t seen any bobtailed animals around the feeder, so I suppose she did get one at least. We are now making sure she gets breakfast in bed, as well as room service as night.

Eddie came to the door Sunday afternoon with a female cardinal in his mouth. I managed to get the bird, and The Squire locked the cat in the kitchen. The bird sat on my finger, panting, while I stroked her head and crooned to her. Once she’d stopped panting, I carried her outside, and she flew off into the trees immediately. I was going to put her in the bushes to catch her breath and get her bearings, but apparently that wasn’t necessary.

If the blasted cat was going to actually catch something, why didn’t he grab one of the vultures that hang around here? A grackle or a starling, for instance?

I am working a switchboard tomorrow, so The Squire and I went over to the library. I don’t like getting paid for reading a book, but you can’t make a switchboard ring, and I can’t stare at the wall for eight hours. While I was writing this, he started to read one of his science fiction books. I just asked him a question, and he popped to the surface as if he’d been sound asleep. “Huh? Huh? Wha..?”

He’s so cute when he does that.

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Where Did You Go, Joe DiMaggio?

14 May

I swear, this house eats things, and its appetite has become more voracious as time goes along.

Some time back, I lost a pillow case between the linen closet and the bed. Now my summer clothes are missing.  Two weeks ago The Squire did the summer-winter switchover, and we shoved his big blue tub into the attic. I tend to stay cold a lot longer than he does, so I wasn’t in any big hurry to pack away my woolies, but now we can’t find my summer stuff.

I got into the attic on Monday and looked in all the boxes, but couldn’t find my things. No big deal; I wore my sweat pants and one of his polo shirts to the gym on Tuesday, but the shirt was so large I was afraid it would fall off it I yawned. He climbed up and looked for the box, I checked the bins in the sewing room, which are only costumes, and we even looked in the workshop (a.k.a. The Black Hole). Nada.

Tonight when we go to pick up the bread from Panera, I will stop in Target and get a couple of things to tide me over until the box turns up. A polo shirt or two in my size, and maybe a pair of summer slacks, and maybe stop at the Thrift Store on Monday. I am fairly certain that purchasing a new wardrobe will make my old clothes turn up immediately.

Ah! Found the sheet from the Red Cross. My hemoglobin was 11.7, and they want it to be between 13.8 and 17.2.

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Tired is What I Do

13 May

I went to the doctor on Monday because I am still coughing from whatever it was that got me in mid-April. I also wanted to know if it was possible to take shots instead of tackling the iron pills because of all the trouble I have with those, and by the way, my feet are swollen.

So – I do still have something in my lungs, for which he prescribed an antibiotic and a codeine syrup. I had a coughing fit Sunday at the dinner theater; the embarrassment was worse than the cough. There was an infant in the audience who made less noise than I did. Pathetic.  The swelling in my feet could be because a) my blood pressure is so low. b) my thyroid is wonky, or c) because I am anemic.  Blood tests all around.

Last time I went to the Red Cross, my b/p was 95/55 and my iron level was more than a point less than what they consider acceptable. I think they want it to be 12.5, and I was 11.2, but don’t quote me on that. Anyway, I’m running a quart low.

They didn’t take me.

I picked up the cough syrup on the way home from Bible Study last night. The directions are to take two teaspoons every six hours. Since two of the meds I take at bedtime are already sedating I decided to only take one teaspoon. I slept, uninterrupted, for ten hours, and then collapsed again at 2 PM and slept another two. It is about 7:15, and I could easily go back up to bed. To quote my mother, “Just because I’m up and moving around, doesn’t mean I’m awake”.

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Double Dipping

10 May
Taken at the dinner theater. A little dark, but I look better in the dark anyway.

Taken at the dinner theater. A little dark, but I look better in the dark anyway.

Ever since the girls were old enough to take care of it themselves, The Squire has refused to do anything for me for Mother’s Day, on the basis that although I am older than he is, I’m not his mother. He also gets snippy if I do anything for him for Father’s Day – even a card – so it evens out.

Thursday, out of the blue, he asked me where I wanted to go for Mother’s Day. (I think this was because the church did not have their annual Mother’s Day brunch. Another can of worms.) I was quite certain I did NOT want to go near a restaurant today, so we decided to go to our favorite Asian restaurant on Friday evening. Lemon’n’Ginger is a fairly new place up near the Y. No chop suey or chow mien, but honest-to-goodness Asian cuisine – Japanese, Thai, and Chinese. I had eggplant and garlic, so you couldn’t get downwind of me most of the weekend.

Yesterday, The Squire and his friend Mac, whom I have mentioned before, went to see Age of Ultron, and Mac mentioned he and his wife and daughter were going to a dinner theater today and asked if would we like to join them.

And so we did.

The play was 1776, a musical about the founding of this country. Very good – the actors were all fabulous, the singing was excellent, and the entire play was true to history. Merciful heavens! To be honest, I couldn’t see how it would be a subject for a musical, but it was very good, very funny in places, and very serious in others.  The song sung by the soldier who has watched others die in battle brought tears to my eyes, and the letters from Washington, expressing his frustration at lack of supplies and fears for his men were very moving. All in all, an excellent show.

So I went from doing nothing for Mother’s Day to going out to dinner twice. How about them apples?

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Pushy, Pushy

8 May

We removed (caught) another snapping turtle day before yesterday, and thought we only had one left in the pond.

This evening Blazer and I went out to feed the fish, and there were two very impatient turtles literally hanging over the edge of the pond, waiting to be fed. Because they were halfway out of the water, I couldn’t throw bread to them, but had to find a small stick (a lilac branch, in this case) break it in half, and put a piece of bread on each one. Once both sticks were “loaded” I held them out and the turtles yanked the bread off. They will only eat store-bought white bread, and I have to use the crusts and the heels so the stuff won’t fall off the sticks. (The center of the bread gets thrown into the middle of the pond so the poor fish actually get to eat.)  I am not the sharpest crayon in the box, but this is as close as we get to “hand feeding” snapping turtles.

I squatted out there for about five minutes, poking food into two gaping maws, while Blazer hovered behind me. Some protector he is! I imagine it was like feeding twins, but most twins don’t have such sharp edges.

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The Atta Boy Card

5 May

I worked yesterday, and came home to find The Squire had hung up and taken down the wash, folded it and put most of it away. He had also found a recipe for a zucchini quiche, picked up the ingredients when he went to the Y to work out, and had dinner ready when I came home.

He had also cut a bouquet of lilacs and crab apple blossoms for the table.

That man got so many punches in his Atta Boy card, he’s going to need a new one. As my sister used to say, “I’m going to let him keep me.”

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Good Morning, Mom!

3 May

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA We had a visitor very early this morning.   We’ve been feeding this momma fox at night out by the barn for eons, but this morning she came down to the house to see if there was anything available. After checking out the birdseed situation, she settled down on the far side of the walk, probably hoping a squirrel would wander in her direction.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAWhen The Squire went out to put down food for her, she bolted, so he carried it back to the barn, which is probably wiser in the long run. We were simply delighted to have her stop for a visit, but we don’t want to have the really wild critters, such a raccoons and foxes, become accustomed to coming so close to houses. Not everybody is as kindly disposed to wildlife as we are.

She is very easy to recognize, as the tip of her tail is missing, and she is obviously lactating, which may explain her hunger. The Cherokee word for fox is tsu-li, so she has become “Julie”.

Speaking of wildlife – today was the rabies clinic up at the fire hall. We put Eddie in the crate, which pleased him no end, let me tell you, and Blazer hopped into the back of the KIA.

“We’re going for a ride! We’re going of Poppa’s car! Oh, boy! Oh, boy!  Where are we going? Who cares?”

He behaved beautifully at the clinic, visiting with all of the people and other dogs, but Eddie set up a yowl I could hear from half a block away. Well, that’s over for another three years, and at $8 a pop, it’s a genuine bargain.

Especially since we don’t know if Julie is just hungry or possibly rabid. She runs away when she sees us, doesn’t stagger, and is not aggressive, but taking a chance is insanity.

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Timing is Everything

1 May

Yesterday, we paid almost $500 to have a tree taken down. Today, the telephone company was trimming trees on the other side of the road, and told The Squire they would have been more than willing to take down our tree, as it was probably tall enough to have presented a hazard if it had fallen across the road.

He didn’t bother to ask them about the River Birch in the middle of the yard.

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Comcast, Part II

30 Apr

We had a fairly large locust tree, about five feet from the road, which died a few years ago. This was not a do-it-yourself project, so we hired a local company to come out and cut it down for us. Not a big deal, about two hours, and not as expensive as it might have been, as we have a friend who heats with wood, and will come over to collect the wood and help clean up the debris.

However.

We also have a River Birch which has died, and it is leaning into the electric wires, as well the wires from Comcast. You may remember that our last go-round with Comcast took almost a month to untangle, and we still aren’t happy with the service. (A classic case of getting what you pay for.) We’ve had Comcast for over thirty years, and when it was installed they did not have the technology for the Quick Disconnect box which is now standard, and we need to have somebody come out to handle this in person.

So – The Squire called Comcast and explained what we needed. I heard him say, quite firmly, “No we do not want to terminate the service.” Transfer to another department, and of course, get cut off. Call back and start over. Once again, the woman who answered grabbed the word “disconnect” and tried to talk him out of cancelling the service and then tried to sell him a bunch of upgrades! After some rather sharp conversation, he did finally get Comcast to understand what we need, and they will send somebody out “soon” to install the Quick Disconnect box, so when the tree people come back, we can drop and replace the line ourselves.

One thing which had bugged us ever since The Squire changed our Comcast service was that things seemed so much slower than before it was “improved”. While the second young lady was checking, she found we only had half the speed we were supposed to have, so she said she was going to fix it.

We shall see.

Once that is done, the tree company will coordinate with Baltimore Gas & Electric to take care of that part of things.

One of the workers dropped his “smart phone” while he was here, and The Squire called the tree company to tell them we have it. The silly thing has rung twice, but neither of us can figure out how to answer it! Ain’t it grand?

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Don’t Bury Me at Sea

29 Apr

I have seen enough water problems in the forty years we’ve lived here to last me well into eternity.

Sometime during the winter a new spring opened up in the flower bed outside the den window. The water runs under the retaining wall, along the walkway, and then spreads across the walk until it reaches a point where it can cross and run down the other side and into a trench The Squire and I dug to direct it vaguely in the direction of the stream. I scrub the walk about once month with the push broom and bleach water to keep the “yuck” under control.

Last week we noticed a new spring about ten feet from one of the two wells in the front yard (We don’t call this place the “Rice Paddy” just to be funny.) and this morning The Squire went out to see if he could figure some way to direct the water toward the well, rather than having another trench or a sinkhole in the front yard.  To make a long story short, the answer is No. We did use the plumber’s snake on the pipe that runs from the well to the pond, and we are hoping that opening that up completely will keep water from seeping up into the yard any more than it is already. The well has so much pressure that it was coming up around the pipe faster than we could sweep the water into the pipe.

We were carrying all the tools back to the house, and I had kicked off my shoes rather than get them all muddy walking across the yard. The Squire, in a moment of pure whimsy, decided to go down the walk “to keep his shoes dry”. Mind you, his shoes cost over $400 and are made to conform to his feet, so this was not a totally unreasonable idea. However, the walk is covered with water – and slime.

Before I had a chance to react, his feet went out from under him, and he went crashing to the ground. He tore up his left shin, and managed to get himself thoroughly covered with dirt. Blazer was hopping all around, trying to help his poppa, and both of the humans – in spite of the pain – were laughing so hard it was difficult to get The Squire upright again.

A warm shower, lots of gauze and Bacitracin, some aspirin, and a dish of ice cream, and I think he’s going to survive.

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